Parenting is only job mostly everybody will get to do one day, so it will be good to learn and prepare for the job even before the time comes. The mode of parenting for each family can be unique and shaped by various factors such as religious influence, cultural influence, individual circumstances and personal values.
Over the years, different parenting styles has emerged each with it's own unique approaches and attributes but all heading towards one direction of raising children who will be successful in the society. One of the reasons for parenting is to dictate the carrier path of the child, the kind of friends he keeps, the kind of relationships he enters and the general lifestyle the child takes up.
Different Parenting Approaches
Below are some of the parenting approaches you can find in Nigeria, although every possible approach in Nigeria will always have some cultural value deeply rooted in it.
Authoritarian Parenting
This type of parenting use to be more common during our forefathers time. Just as the name implies, authority is the watchword, it is marked by stick rules, high demands and no room for responsiveness. It presents more controlling with less nurturing environment for the children.
For instance, a child wants to go play or visit a friend, him or her asks for permission from his authoritative parent, if he gives no as an answer, the discussion ends there. No room for further explanation or the child explaining a possible reason why he should go. "The NO" is final.
Authoritative Parenting
Authoritative parenting very similar to authoritarian parenting because it also has rules and structure, but it provides children with warm, nurturing and supportive environment. There is discipline and open communication/discussion between the child and the parents instead of "everything must be done in my own way mentality".
Obviously parents tend to be more significantly involved in their children's life providing supports, guidance and sharing their expectations
Permissive Parenting
This type of parenting is mostly seen in a case of single mothers, and is characterized by few rules, parents being lenient and indulgent, often avoiding confrontation and little structure. In this approach, parents often view themselves as their children's friend than parents.
Permissive parenting often produce children that are creative and expressive but may struggle with self control and responsibility.
Helicopter/ Over protective Parenting
Just like the name implies, the parents hover and monitor their children like a helicopter. The parents are highly involved in their lives by paying attention to every aspect of the child's experiences and tend to shield them from challenges
On the long-run, children may have difficulties in taking decisions, problem solving on their own and easily get anxiety when faced with adversity
Uninvolved/ Neglectful Parenting
In this approach, parents are unresponsive, uninvolved and not so much interested in their children. Parents have very low demands, little emotional involvement and may intensionally neglect their children's needs. Children raised with this approach always face challenges with emotional development and perform badly academically.
Free-range Parenting
Free-range parenting approach operates by teaching positive essential life skills then allowing the to explore and develop these skills more on their own. Here children are made to independently take risks within safe boundaries. For instance, a seven year old kid can be allowed to walk down the street alone but emphasis will be made on watching both sides before crossing the street and to always put on a helmet while cycling.
Children will definitely develop resilience and problem solving skills but may find it difficult to entertain another person's opinion.
Positive/ Gentle Parenting
Although this approach has been, but it recently got more popular in recent years. This approach works by establishing good parents-child relationship thereby fostering desirable qualities in children by being compassionate and setting realistic standards. Positive parenting ensures adequate communication, empathy and setting consistent boundaries.
On the long-run with gentle parenting approach, children develops strong emotional intelligence, good self esteem and sense or responsibility.
Conclusion
It is important to understand that parenting approaches are not rigid and a parent can combine different styles intelligently to achieve the best possible result. A balance of warmth, guidance and autonomy tends to work. Mostly Nigerian homes also witness a different pattern where the father adopts authoritative approach and the mother adopts gentle or permissive approach.
Understanding the different styles helps each parents evaluate their approaches and make intentional choice that align with the family core values.